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Thursday, 23 October 2014

Spider!!!!!

For quite some time I have been warning people about the impending spider apocolypse, but sadly no one listened and they kept "putting the spiders outside" with no thought to the increasing numbers and species in the country.  I have noticed in recent years, and this year in particular, that spiders are getting more prolific, larger and nastier. It is easier for the dangerous spiders to get in to the country now, They come in accidentally with fruit and other imported products. They can also be seen queuing at airports and docks, passports clutched in their nasty, hairy hands. Ok, maybe a slight exaggeration, but I do think that the importation of exotic spiders is on the rise as people look for more bizarre pets.

To be honest I cannot see the contribution that spiders make to the world. All this rubbish about eating flies is nonsense as most of us clean away the cobwebs. As far as I can see cobwebs are the only way for a spider to catch a fly. I can honestly say, and I am pleased about this, your average English housespider does not jump into mid air grabbing flies as it goes. ( shivering at the very thought) This is mind, how do they do any good?  They string webs around in hard to see places so we walk in to them. ( this may cause hysteria in some people .... me!) and do little else that I can see apart form lurk around waiting for victims.

At 5.30 in the morning a few weeks ago, when confronted with a psychopathic, killer arachnid in my toilet; I knew I had a fight on my hands The rather large furry beast that I had encountered had come with one intention..... to kill everyone that he could find. I knew this because he was weilding a large baseball bat (really). I am not saying he was a little scary, I am telling you he was a monster with eyes like saucers and fangs like a acouple of ice picks. A scuffle ensued and the hellmonster was slain at the hands of a broom weilding maniac. Another eight legged attacker dispatched to spider hell.
My advice to anyone who thinks to attack  me at 5.30 in the morning; do not hide behind the toilet cleaner bottle!!! 


     

Saturday, 4 October 2014

Why the Colour Orange? ……………. How I Named My Blog

I have always been a red, black, purple and blue kind of a girl and as a child blue was my favourite colour. However, a few months ago I got hooked on the colour orange.

I love my orange dress and plan to update my wardrobe with some more orange pieces when I need more clothes. I won’t go for the head to toe tango look and I cannot wear wishy washy peach tones, but a few good, vibrant orange pieces would be rather nice.

To be honest I am also leaning towards the orange accents in stationery too. Paper clips and post it notes in orange have come up in the sales recently and I am happy to see that Paperchase has an orange range of stationery in now. My Filofax “unicorn” is an orange A5 Finsbury, rather elusive but I hope to find one eventually.

So to the origins of my blog name. Originally I was going to call it “The Girl in the Orange Dress” but sadly I discovered there was a book, and an internet link to the book, of the same name. I wanted a name which didn't reflect just one thing that I wanted to write about as I didn't want to be tied to one subject. My feeling was that by allowing myself to write about whatever I chose I gave myself a larger prospective audience and a more interesting range of subjects. Restricting myself would be counter productive as I have far too much to say about so many subjects.


I chose to put coffee in the title purely because it is my favourite drink and I was born in 1969 so added that in too. Throwing the three random things together gave me a unique blog name without narrowing my field of subjects and hopefully draws in readers as they do not know what to expect.

Emails

Emails are a very useful, very quick way of communicating; an ideal in our modern, technological world. They can be a source of interest, amusement or even disbelief if it is a spam email.

In my junk folder this week I have emails from four banks that I do not have accounts with, sending me urgent security updates to which they say I have to respond or my (non-existent) accounts will be frozen.
My junk email folder also contained an offer for a penis extension despite the fact that I do not have one to extend. Call me picky but sending that kind of email to women is asking for trouble. Either it is of no interest and will annoy them or give them ideas that their men may require a little help.
The funniest suggestion by far was an email telling me “how to shrink your clothes” Hello! An email telling me how to stretch them might be more useful. Thinking about it I think the internet spies have seen by Facebook profile picture and just thought they were being hilarious.

Email does work well to link you to websites, online stores and blogs but it can generate an incredible amount of emails. Amazon send me so many offers on a daily basis, as do Odeli. I have never signed up with Odeli.  I tend to sign up to things that may be of interest and send them to junk if the content turns out to be uninteresting.


Whatever happens, whether you sign up to emails or not, they will find you and they will bombard you with emails and some will make you laugh at their total inappropriateness and others will be of interest.  However many friends you do or do not have, once you open an email account you will always have a full inbox. (Whether you want it or not.)

Thursday, 2 October 2014

Quick quote

Today we have a quote  from  a women I know.

" It takes more than hopes and dreams to survive, but life would be endless without them."